हि-nglish Adult Jokes - Page 5


Pappu Aur Paheli
Ek School Mein Madam Ne Bachchon Se Kaha: Aaj Kuch Mazedaar Paheliyan Puchti Hun, Jara Sochkar Jawab Dena.

Bachche: Ji Madam.

Madam: Aisa Kaun Sa Paan Hai Jisko Khaya Nahin Jaa Sakta?

Saaal Sunte Hi Pappu Zor-Zor Se Hasne Laga... Yahan Tak Ki Haste Haste Neeche Bhi Gir Gaya.

Madam: Kya Hua Pappu? Itni Hasi Kyun Aa Rahi Hai??

Pappu: Kya Madam, Aap Bhi Na Kaise Kaise Sawaaal Karti Hain? Iska Jawab Hai "Stanpan".

Madam: Nalayak, Gadhe... Iska Jawaab Hai Japan... Jab Dekho Ulti-Seedhi Baatein Sochte Rehte Ho, Nikal Jao Meri Class Se....

           

Bade Ghar Ki Bahurani
Bihar Ke Is Gaon Mein Cinema Hall Waale Aaj Bhi Film Ka Prachaar Rikshaw Mein Loudspeaker Laga Ke Karte Hain. Ek Din Ek Nayi Film Aayi Aur Uska Announcemnt Kuch Is Tarah Se Ho Raha Tha:

Aaiye, Aaiye, Aaiye...
Bade Ghar Ki Bahurani Ke Maje Lijye, Kal Se Din Mein Chaar Baar, 9 Se 12, 12 Se 3, 3 se 6, Aur 6 Se 9... Aur Raat Mein 9 Se 12...
Aage Ka 30 Rupya Aur Peeche Ka 50 Rupya... Aaiye, Aaiye, Aaiye...

           

Naughty Quickies
Banta Ki Shaadi Hui Aur Vo Apni Nayi Naveli Dulhan Ke Saath Suhaag Raat Manata Hai.
Preeto: Piche Nahi aage Dalte Hain.
Banta: Tuje Kaise pata?
Preeto: Mera dost Mere Aage Se Dalta Tha.
Banta: Chup Kar Mera dost Mere Pichche Dalta Tha.

           

Jija Aur Saali in a Sunsaan Jungle
Ek Aadmi Apni Saali Ke Saath Ek Sunsaan Jungle Se Ja Raha Tha.

Sali: Jija Ji Kahin Aap Is Mauke Ka Phaida Utha Ke Mere Saath Zabardasti Toh Nahin Karenge?

Jija: Tumhe Dikhta Nahi Mere Ek Haath Mein Bakri Aur Danda Hai, Aur Doosre Haath Mein Murga, Rassi Aur balti Hai. Main Kaise Kuch Kar Sakta Hoon.

Sali: Kyon Nahi Kar Sakte, Agar Aap Danda Zameen Mein Gaad Ke Rassi Say Bakri Ko Baandh Do, Aur Balti Ko Ulta Karke Murge Ke Upar Rakh Do Toh Aap Sab Kuch Kar Sakte Ho, Mujhe Aapse Bahut Dar Lag Raha Hai...................

Moral of the story: Man is always innocent. Women gives ideas...

           

Santa Aur Pappu Da Jawab Nahin...
Santa Ne Apni Taxi Bechkar XEROX Ki Shop Khol Li.
Banta Ne Jab Usse Iski Vajah Puchi Toh Santa Bola: Yaara Dil Khush Ho Jaata Hai Jab Ladkiyan Aakar Kehti Hain "Santa Ji, Aage Piche Sono Side Se Kar Do..."

Santa, Raat Ke Andhere Mein: Oye Jeeto Yaar, Ye Condom Itna Chhota or Sakht Kyun Hai?
Jeeto: O Bina Dimaag Ke Jaanwar, Woh Bachche Ke Dhoodh Peene Ka Nipple Hai, Utaar Ise......

Pappu First Time Medical Store Pe Condom Lene gaya. Par Wahan Jakar Bhul Gaya Ki Condom Maangna Hai. Usko Condom Word Yaad Nahin Aa Raha Tha. Kaafi Der Tak Sochne Ke Baad Pappu Ne Zip Khol Ke Kaha: O Yaar, Iska Body Cover De Do!!!

Maths Teacher: Pappu Tere Paasd 6 Lollipops Hain, 2 Rinku Ko Diye, 3 Pinku Ko Diye, 1 Raju Ko Diya Toh Tumhaare Paas Kya Bacha?
Pappu: Ghanta Bacha! Woh Aap Choos Lena...